Of fragility of life here and the need for kindness

As it happens, this night I received another visitation from my melancholy mistress of ‎long, dressed as ever in her terrorizing black and with her luscious black mane undone ‎and wild and oh so long. You guessed it right (or did you? all ye of dirty minds and little ‎literary imaginations), it was another bout with insomnia. ‎

And on this encounter, my melancholy muse tells me about all that I have to fear. About ‎the many reasons why ‎بیرون کشید باید از این ورطه رخت خویش ‏‎ is the right course of action, ‎and why one ought to abandon ship and flee town and take refuge someplace less deadly. ‎And being the reigning regina of my dark hours, in the thick of darkness her counsel seems ‎compelling.‎

The hazardous journey that I embark on daily. This road of pitfalls and potholes that I ‎travel on. These menacing uranium-yellow caravans that pass us by at maniacal haste. The eggshell ‎thin body of this transport that I have pinned my hopes of protection and safety on. ‎
She convinces me of the fragility of life here in this town.‎

And yet I am not convinced. Not enough, at least, to abandon ship -yet. Or, equally ‎probable, not caring. When the sun is up and like a vampire left out of shadows my ‎terrible companion catches fire and becomes ash and smoke and withers away until ‎another nightly rendezvous, things seem less precarious, and life goes on. And ‎sometimes, as on this morning, my transport barely dodges (or does it bend and curve) ‎and avoids an oncoming cavalry of much heft and noise and force and fury by mere ‎inches. ‎

As the feel for danger seems to wither away with the darkness of the hours, so does ‎the softness of hearts, and they harden and freeze into unkind and unforgiving solids. ‎How is it that with things balanced so precariously on the edge, and life more fragile than ‎ever, people can still be unkind to each other? Has no one regretted that last encounter ‎with someone they soon found out was no more there to be encountered? Have I not ‎regretted the same bitterly? Then why? Why keep the pretense that we live safely and ‎sure-footedly and everlastingly, if we are all such at the mercy of circumstances? Why ‎not be kind, if any of us could end up in the wrong place at the wrong time, and not have ‎that last chance to mend and make up.‎

*
post script:

“god damn it, you’ve got to be kind.”
-kurt vonnegut

posted previously on hamesha: one less courageous hedonist

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~ by safrang on May 22, 2008.

5 Responses to “Of fragility of life here and the need for kindness”

  1. […] 1. > of fragility of life here and the need for kindness As it happens, this night I received another visitation from my melancholy mistress of ‎long, dressed as ever in her terrorizing black and with her luscious black mane undone ‎and wild and oh so long. You guessed it right (or did you? all ye of dirty minds and little ‎literary imaginations), it was another bout with insomnia. ‎ And on this encounter, my melancholy muse tells me about all that I have to fear. About ‎the many reasons why ‎بیرون کشید باید از این ورطه رخت خویش ‏‎ is the right course of action, ‎and why one ought to abandon ship and flee town and take refuge someplace less deadly. ‎And being the reigning regina of my dark hours, in the thick of darkness her counsel seems ‎compelling… …As the feel for danger seems to wither away with the darkness of the hours, so does ‎the softness of hearts, and they harden and freeze into unkind and unforgiving solids. ‎How is it that with things balanced so precariously on the edge, and life more fragile than ‎ever, people can still be unkind to each other? …“god damn it, you’ve got to be kind.” -kurt vonnegut continue reading “of fragility of life…” […]

  2. […] of life…again what was it i was saying about fragility of life on here a couple of days […]

  3. […] just so happens that we are, once again in the grip of this melancholy mistress: As it happens, this night I received another visitation from my melancholy mistress of ‎long, […]

  4. Yesterday my boyfriend said, not for the first time, ‘You really need to be less sensitive’, I responded ‘Or maybe we could all be more kind?’.

    Beautiful post, and I agree wholeheartedly with you & Vonnegut on the subject of kindness.

  5. “Hello, babies. Welcome to Earth. It’s hot in the summer
    and cold in the winter. It’s round and wet and crowded.

    At the outside, babies, you’ve got about a hundred years here.
    There’s only one rule that I know of, babies—
    God damn it, you’ve got to be kind.” Kurt Vonnegut

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